Any free time is filled with thoughts about your ex "It's not necessarily triggered by an event that has occurred.
"The thoughts come up out of nowhere," Larkin says. If you're ruminating, though, you don't need a picture to start thinking about your relationship. Seeing an old picture of you and a past partner can unlock a floodgate of memories, even if you've completely healed from the breakup. You don't feel like you have control over your thoughts Here are six indicators you might be hyper-fixated on your ex. 6 signs you're ruminatingĪ sign you've transitioned from simply thinking about your ex to ruminating on them is if your behavior and mood is impacted by these thoughts, says Pamela Larkin, a therapist who specializes in relationships. Many people can mistake rumination for desire, Bobby adds. "Having the experience of ruminating is in no way, shape or form the same thing as love," she says. "Even if we established, intellectually, the relationship needed to end, even if we are the ones who did the breaking up." "This is the body's way of saying, 'we have to reconnect,' whether or not that person is good for us," she says.
This response has nothing to do with how healthy or happy your relationship was. "Ruminating is your mind's way of showing you that there is an emotional injury that needs to be healed." "You break your arm and there is this pain signal that is coming from your body that says, 'I'm hurt, pay attention to me, I need to be healed,'" Bobby says. Losing a partner triggers the same survival instincts our brain deploys when we're in physical danger. Ruminating on an ex is more about our need for survival than our affection for that specific person, Bobby says.Įvolutionarily, we are wired to be social and mate.
0 kommentar(er)
